Collision

A deep sense of melancholy joined me this morning. It did not announce its arrival, but I did notice that it too looked a bit worn out as it meandered in and curled up beside me. There are a few clouds in my coffee. A mist of longing hangs in the air, settling thick inside these lungs. Time seems tilted – slowed almost to a pause. I posed the question to myself as I drove into work “is this yours to feel or someone else’s” – the answer as muddy as the solution. Have you ever wanted to softly touch someone’s face, pull them in, take their hand in yours, fold into them. Let the sound of their heartbeat soothe you to sleep as the whole world fades into the distance. If I could be anywhere in this moment, I would be as drenched in you as my dreams are. If we could go back to whatever galaxy we first collided in – there would be claw marks etched into every surface because it has taken every single lifetime leading up to this one to learn how to let go when I am the only one holding on. Such a peculiar thing to be so sure of something that I have never known – to love a person that might not even exist.